Thursday, November 18, 2010

Birthday and Mother's Day 2010!!

I am glad to have been born on this day and I thank God I am able to complete and begin another year! Today is Mother's Day to me and so Happy Mother's Day mommy! I miss you! Thanks to all of you for wishing me well on today!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Don't Spit Game, If You Don't Plan To Swallow!


It is fun to do at times when you are younger and immature…spitting game. The older you get the less tolerant you are of relinquishing your ignorance towards others…at least most of us who qualify as adults with good common sense! That is what “spitting game” is all about. There was a time (in my high school years) that it was cool and regarded highly to be a “player” or to parade around with many ladies/men because you could. You had it “going on” when you were able to gain another phone number for your cell phone (or pager codes for us 90’s people in the smart beep age) that you could call at your leisure. It is clear that the “player” is still “playing” and the “game” has not changed. I will say with confidence that the age of the “player” (by age I do mean numerical representation of years a person has lived on this Earth) continues to increase and the ignorance displayed does as well.

I would suggest that if the “player” is going to “spit game”, then the “player” should be prepared to swallow. I have a few rules for the “player” to live by, and if the “player” doesn’t abide by these rules, they should not “spit game” or ever attempt to “play”. You never see a wealthy man claim how rich he is, nor do you ever know the plays in the coach’s playbook…unless you are on the team!

A few rules…

1. In order to be a “player” you MUST tell the truth! “Spitting game” is not about lying and it is essential for the truth to be told. If you want the real sense of pride and grandeur, tell the truth…real certified pimps have no choice!

2. If you are going to “spit game” have a good memory! Most people who “spit game” have the lines down to a science and do not deviate. Say what you have said before since it works and make sure you remember the responses you receive, the names you are introduced to, and all information about that man/woman!

3. “Players” do not need one organ of the human body…a heart! Remember that the “game” is tough and not for those who have “feelings” and “emotions”…they get in the way. Do not “spit the game” and try to be a “player” if you have a heart. Having a heart that can be broken means that you will spend time on your knees, and every “player” can never be seen or imagined doing that!

4. “Spitting game” also means that you do not spread the “facts” about your life to those who do not need to know. I am sure the worse thing that could happen is that someone that knows you well can tell someone that you are “spitting game” to all about your past and your current dating situation. It will not make you look good and will diminish your status and fame as a “player”. The rule should be that if it does not help you, no one needs to know!

5. Make sure that you look good and have an enticing aesthetic appearance at all times. With the aforementioned in mind, you must be attractive and have impeccable hygiene. You can not have breath that stinks, hair that is not cut or styled. You have to be able to make sure that if a paparazzi or paparazzo in training is taking a photo (with an I-phone or digital camera) is in your path that you are ready to take that photo with ease. Those that are “players” know that it is important that your image is not tarnished by a picture that is unsightly and embarrassing. We all know that posting your photos on social networking sights like Facebook, Twitter, or MySpace makes you and automatic model. The more photos you have up there the better your modeling career and “player” status improves! In addition, make sure to take photos with ladies/men that you know are attractive. If you don’t, your rank to be able to “pull” the “fine’ ones will diminish incredibly!


If you have any rules or suggestions to add to this short list please do. Help the “player” in training…I think we all need to look out for them! I would rather someone to spit at me than to spit on me!


I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Monday, November 8, 2010

How to receive love...


Much in my life has been taken away from me. All of my life I have given something up. I have had specific items tangible and those that are not stolen from me. Because of that, the empty space has been substituted. I feel like I am a repository of pain. I suppose that is the reason I can not take. That is the reason that that I would rather give to someone else than receive. There is a woman that loves me. I suppose she recognized the pain that I have inside and decided that her love would outweigh and replace my pain. When did I decide to let her love me? When did I decide that her love could erase hurting that has been built up for years? When did I decide that pushing the envelope and pushing just to push, might send her over the edge and for her to decide not to love me anymore? I can’t make the decision of whether or not someone can love me, but I can persuade them that their love can’t erase my agony. I realize that this is my mistake and my problem.

I have had so much snatched away from me, and the residual pride that has been instilled in me gets some sick joy or gratification that “this (fill in the blank) is just like the rest”. I will be the first to admit that it is not right. Unlike the others, I don’t want her to walk away. Unlike before, I know I need her to stay with me. Unlike before I can see. I can place my head on her chest and let it all out, like I did with my mother. I can trust her and not feel that I am going to lose. Why is it so difficult for me to take when someone is giving? I do not desire the “damn fool pride” to reside in me as it has taken root in my soul, to not allow anyone to see me in pain. If the truth be told, they can already see. If the truth be told, it is as apparent as the sun and the moon. It is as clear as the winter’s snow and the summer’s heat. Yet she decided that from what I have given to her, she would give to me as long as I understand that what she is giving is exclusive to me and as difficult for her to give as it is for me to be the recipient.

The only person I can blame is me, and the only person who needs to get it together is me. All that I ask from her is to know that I recognize all of what needs to be done for her to be with me. I don’t want her to hurt and I want to do the same for her as she has done for me, with nothing in return. I can not give to her without taking. It is a partnership and an affirmation of trust that should be guarded, respected, and never taken at face value. It is simply giving without expecting anything in return. It is the genuine preface of love.


I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Happiness...It is a process!


It is an epidemic at times. I have seen it and experienced it for myself. It is called not being happy. What do you do to change it? My answer…it is a process. I had to understand me. I had to get to know me. I had to love me. I had to like me. I had to accept me. I had to accept my situations and state of affairs and in some cases not be happy with it, but accept it for what it is. You have to be honest with yourself. Overall you have to learn to be comfortable about you and be comfortable with you, to be able to become happy. It takes time and yes...it is a process.

In order for you to be in a relationship with another person, you must first have a wonderful and complete relationship with yourself. If you want someone who is going to be honest with you, try and execute being honest with your self. In all that you desire from a mate or another individual, look inward and start with the person who will love you better than any other human being. YOU!!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Thursday, October 7, 2010

All about "her" booty?


I enjoy caressing all parts of a lady. I can start from any part whether it is her hair or her thighs from her toes to the nape of her neck. I enjoy her smell and her touch. I enjoy her softness and her curves. There is one thing that I do ponder about. It has to be a myth concerning the size of a woman’s booty. I am not sure what the obsession that men and women have concerning the size and shape booty happens to be, but it is quite alarming.

I proudly acknowledge that I am a thigh and leg guy! I love nice looking thighs and some sexy legs on a lady, and I am not sure why booty is so significant. I am under the belief (and from experience) that thighs add the cushion and the durability of lady’s participation in scrupulous sexual positions. I suppose that booty is more for the eye candy aspect rather than something that is essential for both men and women. I have dated ladies with different sizes and curvatures to their butt. So I have the following questions:

• What does the booty have to do with the attractiveness of a woman?
• Does a big butt equal better sex?
• Does a big butt enhance sex?
• If a woman has a butt that is not as round or obtuse, is her sexual abilities and attractiveness automatically downgraded?
• Where did this fixation concerning butt size originate?
• Does booty size affect how “her” sex feels?
• If a woman does not have that large of a butt, can her sex then trump a woman who does have one?

What say you?

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Walk like you are a man!


I know that I may not be the lot to every person. I recognize that I may not be the preference for some ladies as a mate or what have you, and I do discern that there is one thing that has by no means been questioned about me…that is my manhood. For all intensive purposes of this entry I will just articulate about one item…WALK LIKE A MAN!!
I do recall there is a song entitled “Walk Like a Man” and it is true. Show some confidence and do not slouch. Stand straight and know who you are and like it as well. Don’t ever cower in your posture to try to get what you wish for. Don’t ever alter the demeanor of your stroll and your stance to purge someone to agree with you or grant your request. I have seen it far too many times that so called “men” do the former and latter and feel that they have achieved because they recoiled to get what they wanted. It is gibberish.

Your stride is not related to your swagger. Some people join these two factors together and feel it is believed to be that way. Not in the least. Your swagger is not PRIMARILY defined by your saunter but rather how YOU present yourself to the world. My attitude can define my swagger. My way of dress can define my boastfulness. The list can go on and on.

Your walk is another item altogether. Your stroll is your main mode of transportation. You walk from one destination to the next. You are seen as you are walking and you are voluntarily opening yourself to scrutiny. Walk like you are a man! Pace like you know who you are and do not care what others think! Toddle with confidence, even if you do not have an ounce of it. Walk, and don’t open your mouth if you are afraid or do not know of what to say. Stride as if no one is watching. Remember why you are walking and not who you are walking with! Walk with pride and dignity. Saunter as if you own the street and the cars that drive about, to and fro! Walk as if you have conquered the world! March with determination and spirit. Walk like you have supreme self-esteem! Walk with you shoulders back, head held high, and with strong paces.

If you declare you are a man then walk like it! Swagger will appear later. If you don’t walk like you are a man…others including you will wonder in what manner are you walking …you might be on your feet, but you may really be crawling!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Spoonin'!!


I can not deny that my hormones have been raging and it is because my side of the bed is empty since the last time “she” was there. I remember the times when we would just chill or look forward to a movie that we had both not seen. The movie is in the DVD player, the surround sound on and pumping and then we are hardly paying any attention to the damn movie! How funny it is to wake up hearing the same music and movie introduction repeat itself from the selection menu. Yeah, you know what we ended up doing...spoonin'!

I never really understood the importance of spooning until; I realized it was an alternative to sex. Now what I mean is that if we aren't going to do it...I want her to know (while spoonin') that I want it…yeah that I really want to do her, but since we aren't ready to go all the way...we spoon. It is all the great taste and feeling of sex, without the sweat and the fatigue (in a good way). We all know that spoonin' can sometimes lead to forkin'. Freaky circus, rug burn, crazed animal sex (damn that is some excellent shit) is all good at the appropriate time, but the sensation of having my arm around you...feeling your breasts, nipples, butt, and all other parts of her body with one arm is gratifying to me.

I can drive her feral with one arm and yet she won’t mind! LOL! We would still have our underwear on and wake up respectful, looking into her gorgeous eyes, and say "Good Morning"...yeah there are some dudes out there like me who can still do that. It is simple and yet intricate at the same time. I don't know if she expected me to kiss her neck, ask her to move closer to me, or when she asked me to hold her tighter, where I was going. Or why I can sleep soundly through the night only when she is next to me...but I enjoy spoonin'!

I don't know what the other fellas would say, but spoonin' is just as fervent as sex. You can sex anyone BUT you just can't spoon with anyone. The fantasy of the amount of head prints on our pillow should not be thought of as notches in our belts.

It takes a lot of work and a hell of a woman to be in my bed (let me reiterate) a hell of a woman! If a woman gets into my bed and gets to spoon with me, there has to be something within her, (not about her) that makes me want to hold her all night. She is a woman that has morals, sexiness in her walk and intelligence! She has values in her speech, codes that she lives by, and one not to lead me on in thinking one thing, when there is actually something else going on. I have had my share of that bullshit!! Maybe I should start a new trend among those who want to have a quality of life that is something that others (whom they want to sex) can see and respect called ...SPOONIN'!!

Think about it...

Spoons are always useful, and spoons are smooth and not rigid. Spoons are the same for the most part. They are used to feed infants. Spoon-like devices help to make and develop land. A spoon is an aid in creation. Spoons remind us of happy times, when the candy lady made that sugary ass, syrup ass Kool-Aid!

Spoons remind us of the tea grandmother used to make. I recall I would watch her stir and make the perfect iced tea. I remember my granddaddy and his grits, his oatmeal, and man how that food looked good on the spoon...how it tasted was even better. I remember eating ice cream with a spoon and the looks on the faces of my students a few years back when they made their ice cream and how they looked at their creation on the spoon. I remember how my mommy would put the mayonnaise on the bread with a spoon and it was as smooth and even as could be.

Maybe I have taken this spoon thing way to far, but there is an importance to spoonin'. Think of the times you had a spoon in your hand and the uses of the spoon, just a simple spoon.

I look forward to the time when I am spoonin' all day and all night with her. I promise not to be a spoon hoe, or spoon whore...what the hell would that be called...I can't even think of it right now. So I submit this on behalf of the spoon.

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Friday, October 1, 2010

October is here!!


No need for me to go into detail. October is always a month that new experiences and good times occur! I am ready, willing, able, excited, and anxious!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Thursday, September 30, 2010

So You Call Yourself Daddy, But You Are More Like A Biological Contributor!


The contents of this blog may disturb both the men and ladies in this situation. I feel that since I came from a single parent household, and was a victim of my biological contributor’s ( or father’s) irresponsibility to an obligation (that being me), that I have the right to speak about this issue. In addition, I hope that anyone that reads this particular blog has a new perspective about owning up to responsibilities of any variety since it is a gift and honor to be able to create another human life.

For the guys…

Gentlemen, you are not taking care of the children that you help to make! It is ridiculous that ladies feel the way they do after a night of fervor and missing their menstrual cycle that they really could not depend on you IF she got pregnant. It is awful that they say the latter in conjunction of wondering if they could even count on you to do right in a relationship! This is not funny anymore. Men have this attitude that as long as they pay “what the court” says they should pay, that the men are doing some type of service to a child that he helped to produce…that night, day, and evening, what have you! Do not expect for someone to give you a pat on the back when you do something you are SUPPOSED to do!

Let me come from the scientific and statistical perspective that is not widely in use for you to understand what I am conveying. There is NO guarantee that a man is able to impregnate a woman. There is a 50/50 chance that a man will be successful...whether on purpose or not. In the case that a man gets a lady pregnant it is a 50/50 chance that the child will be a boy or a girl. Moreover, there is a 50/50 chance that the child will be born without any defects. The odds are in limbo, and it is a MIRACLE that a child is born with no serious defects, with the mother surviving, and with few complications.

There are many men out in the world who would love the opportunity to produce children, and have tried various ways medically and otherwise to do so and not have their dream of producing a child fulfilled. There are men that adopt and accept the child even if that child is not biologically theirs. These men gladly and willingly love a child that they did not generate genetically.


Why in the hell (from the blessings that “biological contributors” have been given to be able to impregnate a woman and produce a healthy child) would you not take care of it? This has nothing to do with taking care of the lady, but taking care of the child that you as a man have been blessed to produce. It has gotten to be too common these days that a man is more concerned with stocks, cars, businesses, clothes, status, money, contracts, screwing other women, etc. that they feel a monetary check will raise their child…that a child support check will love their child…that a child sustaining payment is equivalent to hugging their youngster…that a court ordered child support payment is equivalent to cheering their kid at a sports event to urge and support the child. When did a payment or a monetary check become the substitute for child rearing? It is ludicrous that the lady is not only standing there with a positive pregnancy test, and the broken condom to go along with it…because a man…a “biological contributor” is too damn lazy to do anything but get hard, come, and roll out of the scene!

For the ladies and the guys…

Children deserve a lot more than an imbursement to be molded into human beings that have more self respect and dignity than their “biological contributors”. I feel it is an indignity and a crime that this continues over and over and over, and that SOME ladies continue to allow the trend to define their children, the father’s (I use the word “father” loosely) of their children, and ultimately themselves. If both men and women make better choices in whom they decide to sleep with then some of this chaos would not ensue. Primarily, men need to act like men in word and deed and take care of what is theirs. Don’t be upset or surprised if someone else decides to take care of your child…or if your child, when that day comes, decides to NEVER take care of you!!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Monday, September 27, 2010

SEX...A weapon of mass destruction!!


Many people like to converse about “weapons of mass destruction” and like to place sex in the same category. Imagine a couple that has had a big argument, and one of them chooses to withdraw on sex because that is their way to get revenge. BIG MISTAKE! Most of us like sex…place me in the category of people that enjoy it to the utmost. Is it the Scorpio in me...I guess so. I digress. I believe that if you place that much emphasis on sex, and that the person you are with is that dumb to entertain it, you will not have a great, sustainable, and valuable relationship.

Sex IS overrated. Yeah I said it. A man has said that sex is overrated. Don’t let someone else tell you that it isn’t. If sex was so important than it would not be sold (for such cheap prices) or given away by others for free. Sex would not be downgraded to a lady or man walking the street of the “bad neighborhood” giving anyone who drives by the opportunity to “pay to play” in a cheap hotel, van, car, dumpster, etc.

You as the equal party of the bond, set the “going rate” for sex. If you give it up faster than the change hits the bottom of a parking meter, then it is not that precious to you. It is just another “weapon of mass destruction” to gain an advantage over someone. The latter is true whether or not you had sex with the person the first night you met them or the 456th night that you went out with them!

Continue to use sex as a weapon that and see what happens. Don’t feel that it is a gender related issue. There are men that use sex as a weapon as well as ladies. These individuals do not have any capacity to have a correlation based upon genuine concern and admiration. A relationship based on complimenting the wants (non-sexual) and desires of a person. Interactions in which they are enjoy giving of their heart and soul…rather than their sexual organs and sexual fluids that are expelled. Get with it everybody, if you want to destroy something that is built, throw the grenade of sex into the relationship foxhole and see what happens. You will not only hurt the other party or faction, but you will ultimately hurt yourself!

What say you?

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Can your potential mate do these 2 things?


Amerie released a song a few years ago called “1 Thing”. It is a jam and I love it (Especially the video...she is a hottie!!). I wish there was a male version called “2 Things”. I don’t ask too much from a woman. I don’t ask for sex or presents. I do not ask for money or for her to pay any of my bills. I do not ask a lady to let me borrow her car or for her to come to my house and clean it for me. I won’t ever ask for those things because I can take care of myself. Isn’t that what a man is supposed to do? Isn’t that what a responsible adult (notwithstanding gender) is supposed to do?

I have read many descriptions to illustrate a woman as being “good”. I am sure we have all heard the spill that she or he may say that she or he is “good”. They will say “I am a good woman/man!” These individuals will swear up, down, left, right, north-northwest, south-southeast that they are “good”. It is from my experience that these self indulged “good” men and women are stating and living a farce. I only ask a woman for 2 things in a relationship…time and honesty!

Allow me the time to get to know a lady and spend time with her. How do we inter-act when we are alone or our in public? Is her attitude the same or does it switch? I feel that the time aspect is important. IS the person that you want to consider someone as your mate a person that will willingly give of their time when you ask them to? This goes beyond the “booty call” hours of the night and early morning. Think about that the next time you ask a potential mate to go out, chill, or hang out.

Some people do not ask for honesty and they wonder why they are fooled or not clear as to where they stand in a courtship or relationship. Ask for honesty! There is nothing worse than going into the situation of getting to know someone and the reason why something did not work out is because YOU did not ask for the person to be honest. That also means that YOU must be honest. Do not ask for something in a courtship or relationship that you do not bring to the state of affairs.

IF these self-righteous “good” men and women are so “good” why can’t they do two simple things that I ask for? Why can’t they do the two simple requests that I am sure that THEY ask for? Is it because they do not have the fiber to ask for something that they think since they are so “good”, they do it anyway? Are they more in love with the thought of being so “good” that others who try to mate with them will automatically think they bring the time and honesty aspect to the forefront? I am not sure what it is, but I know for a fact that “good” people do not have to prove how “good” they are. It is obvious! No questions have to be asked…but it is always good to make sure you are asking for what you want, rather than to ask for what you expect!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The Winter Boo Sweepstakes!!


The fall season is soon approaching and the weather will twirl from hot, to comfortable, to chilly, and then to cold! We all know in the dating world and dating scene what that means. It is time for…”The Winter Boo Sweepstakes”!

When the summer flavor approaches its end, there is always an influx of men and women that want to get their cuddle on as well as their guaranteed Thanksgiving feast, Christmas gift, and New Year’s Eve “Box Spring Boogie”. It is not a surprise (at least to me) that those men and ladies that were not as attractive in the warmer months become the sexy trigger in the colder months. I find it fascinating. Why does this happen? Why is it the same cycle every year, every season, the same occurrence?

What say you?

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

GO 49ERS!!!!


ENOUGH SAID!!!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Monday, September 20, 2010

Don't go on "The Biggest Loser"! Try my weight loss plan!!!


Set the stage for this. You have numerous contestants that apply or whatever process is used to determine their eligibility to appear on a show that will essentially help them to lose weight. I am guessing that they leave their employment, either bring their family or leave their family, stray away from their homes for months to appear on a television show that will for all intents and purposes help them to lose the weight that they have been trying to lose for years.

When these people appear on the show they compete to see who has lost the most weight. This competition is done either on an individual or on a team level. There are prizes and perks given to those that reach and over achieve their weekly goals of how many pounds lost. This motivation whether it is health, money, competition, wearing the clothes they have always wanted to wear, sexual attractiveness, etc. is the motivation behind their weight loss.

Are you kidding me? I have been over 400 pounds and the only motivation I had to lose weight was that I did not want to die. It was not a factor of money or the thrill of competition that motivated me. This type of show was not even thought of back in 2000! I remember when I watched the show for the first time. I saw these overweight and obese individuals walking up an escalator that was going down. They continued to walk for hours on end, until they were not able to move anymore. A winner was deemed and then they received a prize and great laudatory remarks from everyone in attendance. I can’t clearly recall but some were on the escalator for at least 3 hours and it was for a monetary prize or an all expense paid trip. This bothers me because there are plenty of obese persons on the planet and in the U.S. that I am sure have applied to be on this television show, and were denied for whatever reason. Next, why entice people and try to increase ratings exploiting the struggles that these individuals and families have had with weight loss? Have we really reached that low?

If I could produce a pilot television program just like this show that I am speaking of, that all could learn from my tips wherever their locale, I would change the way people were selected by choosing at least 100 people that were no less than 50 pounds overweight per television season. If you follow my plan wherever you live, I am sure you can adapt it to your locale and be successful! I would then take them to New York City, maybe on the outskirts of Harlem and have them live in a home. I would then tell them that they can eat whatever they want whenever they want. There would be some rules regarding this such as:

1. You must leave the house by 7:30 AM EVERY morning.
2. You are not allowed to take a cab to go anywhere.
3. You must walk everywhere you go.
4. You must drink as a minimum 200 ounces of water a day.
5. You are only allowed to take the subway as transportation.
6. Everywhere you go must be at least 50 stops away from Harlem
7. You must visit at least 3 museums or attractions a day from all boroughs.
8. Fundamentally you must WALK WALK, WALK, and WALK, EVERYWHERE!!

I can almost guarantee you after 2 months of this; you will see the pounds melt off of people that happen to follow my proposed plan. I don’t know but it seems that this type of action would get these folks losing weight with the quickness. Take that television program in question!!

What are your thoughts?

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Keep on walking, in your HEELS!!!!

I will not deny my hate for flops! Yes flip flops and sandals of any kind. I have a friend that wears what I call her “battle sandals”. They look like she is a part of the Greek army and about to go fight some war! I always tell her that I will not be seen with those hideous looking things on her feet. She gets away with it telling me her feet hurt and on and so forth and that they are comfortable when walking to and from the subway. That explanation I can understand, so I said just buy a pair of walking sneakers! RETIRE THE BATTLE SANDALS!!

I also hate flops. They are shower and jail shoes to me. I have been to amusement parks when people wear those ugly things and the soles of their feet are just dirty and filthy. Then these same filthy feet people want to get on the water rides…YUCK! I will not ride the water ride, or go into a pool with people that have been walking ALL DAY (or night) with dirty feet!

I had to get the latter out of the way. Now that it is gone let me explain my point.

I am sure I am not the only man that enjoys a woman walking in heels. Ladies, stop telling men how much they hurt your feet and such. STOP IT! We men deserve to see you looking and walking in your best at all times! Truth be told, heels are much better for your feet and back than those tacky ass sandals and flops, but I digress.

I enjoy seeing a sexy, professional, sassy, chic, woman walk in heels. (I don’t like seeing the “my feet hurt walk”…but it is funny!!) I have another friend that transforms into her beautiful, sassy, switch that ass walk when she is wearing her heels and secretly when she walks like that, it turns me on! I think she knows it but I don’t say a thing to her about it. I am sure many men are turned on either overtly or covertly by women walking in heels, but why in the ham sandwich must you ladies wear those damned flops and tacky sandals ANYWHERE and especially to the club out of all places? I saw this action done recently when I went to a club and I almost chocked on my Corona! LOL

All I can say is that IF ( and that is a very big IF) I get married, I will give my wife a credit card account that I will pay for in which all she can do is buy heels and purses (yes I know they must match that is why I added that stipulation). She had better not buy food or a damn drink with that card. It is for the aforementioned and that’s it! I can not have my wife walking around with a shoe game that is not tight. She can fund her own clothes and such, but the shoes and handbag, I will make sure that is paid for!

What do you think?

Should men take an active stand to make sure that his woman wears what the man and woman both like?

Men, would you do this for your wife?

Ladies, is this request of leaving the flops and sandals alone a legitimate request?

What say you?

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

LADIES...Stop being stubborn and listen to your friends!!!


I wonder why many ladies put themselves through the B.S. they say they do not want to contend with with regards to relationships with men. Friends both male and female have advised a lady person to leave a no good man alone. They have advised that the man is not for her.

The man in question has told the woman that she is immature, silly, nosey (when asking about his discreet phone calls and whereabouts), bothersome, etc. She still calls him and answers his phone calls, asks her friends for advice and she gets pumped up with confidence and determined to leave the man alone...only to go right back into the same rut of messing with a man that has said and shown that he does not want her...(well maybe want her for sex and sex only)!

I do not understand when all of that has been presented and is plain to see, why a woman would continue to go forth and recycle the pain over and over again? Sooner or later the cycle will end in more pain and anguish than it was in the beginning.

So the question I ask is this...why do you do ladies (for the most part) discount the good and sound advice from friends and elect to endure the wrong doings of a man that ultimately has no concern for her?

I love You, But God Loves You More!

Friday, September 17, 2010

The Adonia Effect!


I remember that I was as scared as I could be coming from a world that was not corporate into a world that is corporate. I came from working in a classroom and a lab, to working into an office setting...including gaining my own personal office, not a classroom/lab. I met up with Adonia in Chicago early last year and I tried to play it cool about my new job and the opportunities/responsibilities that I had just earned. I told her..."I did not know how to handle it". By "it" I mean the money aspect, the corporate card, and basic business "world" and "acumen" regarding the new employment I earned.

When we fast forward to the present, it seems like it was ages ago that we were in Chicago. That fear of "it" has subsided because of the "Adonia Effect". When we were in Chicago I was acting cheap and frugal! I will admit I was very worried about my finances to the point of being damn near crazy. Adonia happened to remind me that you get what you pay for, and that I should not deny myself experiences and learn how to assimilate into this new corporate life. I think she has done a very good job. I am still the frugal person that I have always been (or should I say fiscally responsible?), and I have learned to treat myself and that bills will always be there to pay, savings were meant to be spent in the long run.

I have realized that you get what you pay for. I have realized that good food, that is fresh and prepared with meticulous diligence will cost money (and not have any seasonings on the table). So I owe that to her. She in a matter of a few days broke me out of the habits that I had formed being an underpaid teacher. So here is to you Adonia...a glass of Moet in a plastic cup! LOL Okay a crystal wine/champagne glass!

I Love You, But God Love's You More!

Get Me Bodied!! What does it do to you?

I went to a party last night and (in fact I want to include all parties and clubs that I have gone to) and they play Get Me Bodied! I don't know what happens, or what entity takes over their body, but the ladies dance in a way that is so damn invigorating. I am not the biggest Beyoncé lover (her body, looks, and music), however she did do a good job with this particular song. I have seen women of all shades and shapes just get wicked when they dance to this particular song.
I wonder if someone could compile a video that displays what I am talking about.

If you are a lady and you are reading this, please chime in and tell me what does this song do to you?

If you are a guy reading this, am I right about this song?

I have included the video so some of you ladies can dance as you read this entry! LOL




I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Want to borrow some money? Try this method...


The best method to borrowing money is to not borrow or lend it at all. I do not know why people like to ask me for money but I will say no. If they are my friend I will say no. If the person is my enemy of course I will say no! If I do not know the person and they ask me on the street corner I will say no! I do not know why people ask their friends for money FIRST knowing that it can ruin a friendship. I know me, if I don’t get my money back; I am taking them to Court, no questions and no hesitance from me. I will do it in a heartbeat. I will save my friendships by not lending out or asking to borrow money.

Take a look at this a little further and you will see what I mean. Someone may ask you for a $300 loan. Now this person is $300 in the hole and asks you to lend them this amount to get them out of the hole. Consider the following:

o When will the person pay you back?
o How long will it take them to pay you back?
o What frequency will the money be paid back? Installments? Lump sum?

These answers may vary, but they are critical to your saving your friendship.

Let us consider another option. We have seen the numerous commercials for pay day loan establishments that will lend almost any amount to someone that has a job. Why does the person requesting the money not go there? Consider this:

o The requestor must provide a pay stub, physical address, banking information, etc.
o The requestor must pay the loaning establishment the money back PLUS interest in a lump sum.
o If the requestor does not pay the loaner the money back, they can garnish their wages; pursue legal action, etc.

When you look at it, it would seem that if a person wanted to borrow money from you that they might be trying to pull a fast one or try to fool you. I don’t know but it does look odd to me. I would rather sustain my friendship and not loan the money than to risk it and potentially end a friendship because a loan was not repaid or paid in an un-agreed, slowly paid fashion.

There are other ways to look at this; I just chose the few that I have encountered. What would you do?

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

The Crossroads!


I realize where I am in my life at this date and time. I tell you I have had this anxious feeling for a while and it is not as jubilant or as great as people may think it is. I can not complain about my life and the way it is at this point, but it seems that after I made a decision to voice my frustrations and took a stand on figuring them out and facing them, I have had a huge weight lifted from off of my shoulders. Not only is my standpoint an anxious feeling, but it is one of wonder and a little of fear. I am usually in tune with what my next move whether large or small will be…such as going back to school to earn my PhD, or buying a house, but something in me has said stay put and just wait. Something inside me has said just be patient and do not move too swift.
I recognize this feeling and disposition as being at the “crossroads”. This is not a bad thing, but my analytical mind is trying to figure out what to do with uncertainty, when I don’t need to really do anything. See how confusing that last statement was? I also feel that if I do not do anything about my “crossroads” dilemma that I might be missing out on something. You can’t miss what you never had right? I suppose that the former is moot. I deduce that I am at peace with the way things have been going as far as my situation is regarded and where it is headed. What I will be doing in 6 months I have no clue. What I will be doing in 1 month I have no idea. All I can do is continue to do what I have been led to do…be patient…and not move too hasty. I have to continue to pray as well, that always helps! Let’s do it!


I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Thursday, July 29, 2010

She is He and He is She!


I have noticed in the past several days that the trials in the dating life that I am enduring and have endured, women have as well. Why is this a surprise? Because I have ALWAYS thought that women have had the upper hand in this whole relationship game. For the most part I still do, but maybe they have been the recipient of the same mess I have been though…just on opposite side of the gender gap.

I can admit that I am not ready for a relationship, but I am ready to mingle and see where things can go. Knowing the latter means a lot, because for the first time I am able to actually say that I should not be in a relationship, because I will probably mess it up, try to impress her and get mad that she is not impressed by my actions and words, hook up with a chick because she wants something that I am not giving...like money, or just for miscellaneous reasons. I really need to get myself together before it is too late. I can say that I have some pretty cool female friends that listen to me and that I do not group them into the same category as all other women, but it takes time to get them there…remember I don’t trust anyone.

This is a process and it may take a long while. This does not mean that my sexual activity will subside…maybe it will, but I know and I have made it known (as she has also) that we are just doing this for our own purposes. I know it is not supposed to be like that, but I might change my mind. Maybe the introduction of sex into anything messes it up. We shall soon see, but I now have a clearer understanding that men and women do each other dirty, BUT I still believe women have the advantage. Until I meet a woman that can change my mind (and I probably won’t) my view will stay the same.

I Love You, But God Love’s You More!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

It's Time!

There comes a point when you realize that if you don't do something to stop the bleeding (no pun intended), end the madness, recognize and end the pain, that it will kill you or destroy you. I have made the first step today. I am very close to going over the edge, if I haven't already, so I am going to do something about it and at this point I don't really care what anyone might think...even those of you who are reading this. I understand that I am one of the smartest people in the world, yes I am a genius, but then I should be able to recognize that I can not do this alone any longer. I also realize that I am the person to blame for some of this and that I have let it go too far, so I have to stop it. I have to be the one to make the changes and make things better.

It has been years and years of of me taking it and just letting it settle in me. The it being pain, anguish, hurt, dispair, and now add anger, anxiety, and of course depression. What makes me happy? I know that music does. There is nothing like being on stage and performing. Chemistry, I hate to say it right now is not making me happy, it is something that I love dearly, but it is not helping my mental aches and pains. It is not soothing my soul as it should be...so there needs to be an intervwntion before I am no more. I might blog more often than I have in recent months...and we will see how it goes. I do know that I have already mentally prepared and made a change and what I will do on Monday puts my plan in action. So once again I say...it's time!!

I Love You, But God Love's You More!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

The Re-Introduction!


I have done a lot of "cutting off" lately. I have "cut off" people, started some new habits, and venturing out slowly but surely. It is a new re-introducing of myself...again. What that means in its entirety I do not know but, it seems I have to do it. As I have written in previous entries I have grown tired of the lip-service people happen to bring...friends and otherwise... and though some may find that I am being negative, I am being realistic. I am really tired of the stupidity and if I don't "cut off" the things that bother me...and don't speak on then I feel I am doing a service of malice to myself! It just brings to mind the humanistic stupidity that we ALL have. There are so many ideas of good and evil, right and wrong, negativity and positivity, with the billions of people on Earth, we just fight and bicker over it to the point of physical violence. I digress. I am entering a new period of re-introduction to the world. I can not say I do not like who and what I am right now, but sometimes a clearer definition without the frills is a good thing.

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Disappointment Appointments!

I have really had enough of the disappointment individuals throw at you. It is a damn shame. I suppose it is because I have this high standard that I hold people to, and that people want to be separated from others, but I don't do that. Friends get offended when I group them together, but yet I see them as the same. I suppose that is a flaw that I have but it comes back to the point of being tired of disappointment. I wish people would take more responsibility of what comes out their mouth and what they contract themselves to do for others. I think that if that type of action is done in most cases things would be better. We will see though, we will see.


I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

SNAP!


I find myself at the point that I am going to snap. I should preface this by saying that this might be a season thing. I am not a fan of the summer season and maybe that is what this is, but my ability to tolerate is extremely shorter now than it has ever been.

If there is one thing that is probably my most recognizable trait (other than my intelligence) it is my skepticism. I have explained in previous blogs my distrust for people, but one way to really get me angry is to not keep your word! I have been brought up that all you have in life is your word and that you should honor it at all times. If there is something you can not do then you should tell the person you told that you could do something that you can't, and then have the courtesy to offer another solution or a way to be able to meet their request. Unfortunately, some folks on this Earth (if not the vast majority of them) have not learned that lesson. That is one way to get me to cut you off and never speak to you again...is to not keep your word. I do understand that things may come up and arise that a commitment can not be made...then say so! Say it either before or after, but say something. I am sure some asshole will say, "I don't owe you and explanation!", when in fact it is the opposite. You do not know what the other party has done to try to meet your request or something that was done that was dependent upon your action either large or small. Explain something! It is a damn shame that folks can not do the simple shit and expect a large reward in return, or any reward for that matter.

Another reason that I am about to snap is the way folks just want to get in touch with you either initially or otherwise when they want or need you for something. Now why call, text, e-mail someone out of the blue to ask them something when you can not even do the same just to see how that person is doing. Folks then wonder why the other party is skeptical because they were not paid any attention to or asked anything until the requester of the favor decided to come to you in a candy coated fashion and ask you to do something for them. Why do that?

I have been a recipient of this on many occasions and I wonder why do people do that. Then another question comes to mind, if I am not able to grant your request who else will be or could have been asked? Interesting how people come and say that you are the only one that can help them knowing damn well that there are others, that probably told the requester no by other folks and decided to give you a try because you are the fool. I am considering the request that was made to me as I type and I do see some shadiness in it. The more I think about it the more I smell bullshit!

If you think this blog is one of complaining...no it is not one of those but it is one to put folks on notice and also a reminder to myself. This blog could also be used by someone in the same situation (although I doubt it) as I am in with the shadiness of people and at my breaking point! If you feel that you are in this dilemma...CUT THOSE PEOPLE OFF!


I Love You, But God Love's You More!

Friday, June 25, 2010

Same Shit...Different Toilet!

I have noticed that many women will say that they are different from other women. That they are not as bad, trifling, scandalous, and so on and so forth...(they claim). I know for a fact that those statements about not being as bad as other ladies are a lie. If you ask most men they will tell you the same thing. I don't believe it unless I see it and hear it at the same time. It is not possible for me to believe otherwise! I will even be as bold to say that my own mother had the same tendencies that make women the deceitful and blood sucking creatures they can be!

I will not try to cut corners in my statements. I am not one to try to escape what I have said based upon my relationship with them and of who they are. I am wiling and able to give credit when it is due and to also admit when I am wrong. I have met many women and they seem to be cool at first...the "representative" is in play at that time, usually the beginning. As soon as the "representative" vanishes...same shit, different toilet woman shows up...that is when she feels she has done what she is supposed to do to fool you into believing she give a damn about you! I have yet to see and meet a woman that will honor her word, and act with integrity and dignity amongst other qualities and sustain them as their way of life. Am I holding my breath to see it...no I am not, but I can not and will not be surprised. There is a reason this shop is closed for business...because the customers were never satisfied!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Monday, June 21, 2010

Another Reaction!


I will say that I spent most of my weekend at home and crying. I will not lie that my mind has been racing since I read the depositions of the surgeons that worked on my mother. I will say that it is a mess...but I am not too concerned because I am confident of the result being in my favor. As I have said before I have looked in the eyes of many people and seen them for what and who they truly are. I am a good judge of character and I feel that God has put that in me...heck someone has put this quality in me. Those surgeons...well God bless them but I am sure that the are haunted by the questions of what they did wrong and what they could have done to save my mom's life. I can't think of or about what they are dealing with..that is their own cross to bear and for them to discuss with God.

I know that I have been chosen by God to go through the hard things. I am not saying I have had it the hardest but I find it cool that God is like...Hey, Clint can deal with this and I will see him through...he is that tough. I have made Clint that way. I have made him understand that his reaction should not be typical. I have made him to understand that he should hold still and wait on his God to see him through. JUST WAIT ON GOD CLINT!

I suppose that is why I have the patience that I do. I have high expectations and a high level of patience...and people may not see that, but I do. So I will promote to you, that if you are "going through it" sit back and have another reaction. One that is not so common but one that makes sense...that is not emotional...one that is thought out and then just WAIT!

Even though someone is sweating and out of breath does not mean they won the race. Sometimes the race is won by those who have no sweat on their brow and are breathing easy!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Red Dollar Days!


I have encountered Red Dollar Days, not from the perspective of having it (because I never will) but as the recipient of the attitude and outright disrespect that is given to a man when a woman has Red Dollar Days...yes her period. Don't get me wrong, I will never understand nor experience the pain and agony of that "time of the month" but when there is a grand opening and the Red Dollar Days start, I am sure a woman can learn how to control her attitude and the manner in which she treats people...especially us innocent men! Please stop the insanity of telling us men how you hate the way we breathe, how we walk, how much we get on your last nerve, how messed up in the head we are, how we (you fill in the blank,) and ask for a pass because of Red Dollar Days, I do know us men have our moods and yes, we men can control those as well. If you feel that you can not get a handle on your actions and emotions during your cycle...tell us that you need some time to deal with it and we will leave you alone and ask you to just get in touch with us when you feel better. That is all I ask. Don't use us men as a target for your aggression and then rationalize it because of your period. It is not right. I might catch a lot of attitude for writing this from a woman that just might be on Red Dollar Days! LOL

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Punctuation

Questioning the imperative
I pondered the questions
Interrogative declarations
Enhanced the statement
It called for a pause
Before I ran on
I demanded an interpretation
With exclamation
About your sensations
Meticulous questions
Became my friends
Your enemy until the surrender
It was just a fragment
Incorrect grammar
Your period
My question mark
Caused the comma
Pause
Before I ran on again
Sprinted away
The period finally came
Exclaims the end


I Love You But, God Loves You More!

Monday, June 14, 2010

Delayed Reactions!

I purposely did not write up here on the one year anniversary of my mother's death. It would be too typical to do that especially living in a place that always denotes the years when a major event happened, or something awful that occurred on a particular day and time, year or month, I am not doing that. I will say a few things. This first year was difficult, but I know it could have been much worse. I am thankful for all that she has taught me and I do feel I will be better as the years go by.

I Love You But, God Loves You More!

Bitch - Inn


Talk about changes

Isn't that life

Look at the seasons

None of them repeat twice

Don't try to be clever

Within your pain and strife

You can only bring yourself down

There are no lip prints

On your heart

No evil kisses

That has torn your soul apart

Do you remember?

What was done to you shouldn't last

You can only bring yourself down

Throw it away

The somehow and how come

Nothing left to say

What was has already been done

Can't be your own fool

When it is you that you will lose

Depression is not a tool

And guilt trips aren't a cruise

Check out of the bitch - inn

Sometimes you can be your only best friend

Until you begin again



I Love You But, God Loves You More!

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Got Opinions?

I was called conceited. I was called unattractive/ugly. I was questioned as to why I am a genius (notice I left out the words "consider myself"). It has been said to others and myself that I am arrogant, aloof, stubborn, and etc. I have been called silly and a clown. I have been mentioned in passing as one who is wise and talented...intelligent and straightforward. I suppose I could go on for eternity but I want to make sure that what I am about to say is very clear, and you can also tell others the same thing when they have opinions and non-complementary thoughts about you.

Tell those people this: Your opinion and the words you say about me do not and won't ever affect me enough to change who I am. There is an opinion from someone that is more important than yours and my job is to please that person. I am a genius because I was made and told that I am a genius. I am very attractive and pleasant on the eyes because I was made that way. I am arrogant, because I am loved by someone that will ALWAYS love me for my aloof nature, my stubborn disposition, my silliness and acting like a clown, my wisdom and talents, and my intelligence and ability to be honest with folks even if it hurts them. I am what God made me to be and until your opinion outweighs His...I will not stop being who I am and loving it!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Ladies...your biggest relationship flaw!!


I have said this time and time again and I suppose I need to make it more clear. If you want to have a good relationship or determine if a guy is into you...DON'T! You will hurt your own feelings. Ladies, you have to change your thinking if you want to be successful in your courtship. The worse thing to do is to believe that every single man you meet, that you might go out with, have dinner, go to a movie, and so on...is a man you will be with or have as your boyfriend. You can not think that way. If you had dinner with a man, just think of it as...dinner with a man. He may have an interest and you may as well, but he is not obligated to you and vice versa. Do not put the cart before the horse, if he is into you, you will know it. Do not force spending time with him or demanding more communication, those facets of friendship will progress if it is meant to be. If not, keep it moving. The main thing to keep in mind is that you should not look at things for what they could be, but rather as what they are! Do not look ahead...look at what is in front of you and measure along that standpoint. It will save you some pain and agony. It will also not waste your time!

I Love You But, God Loves You More!

Monday, May 24, 2010

UN-INTENTION-ON!



I noticed your fine brown frame walk past me as I was sipping my Long Beach Iced Tea…
I will admit that you did caught my eyes again from across the room but I didn't want to stare…I know how rude that is…
But I saw the way that the glass that contained your Mohito…reminded me of me…sweating in front of you as you were about to kiss the straw for a tantalizing taste
The kissed seemed like an instantaneous lifetime when I watched you...after I licked my lips from the essence of my beverage
Was it your purpose to do to me what you did…
I truly don't want you to choke...or even disturb your pallet from its comfortable status of cool
It's not my purpose to have that affect on you
I honestly didn't know that Issaey Miyake was your favorite fragrance on a man…
But tell me how did you know that DKNY Be Delicious was my aromatic aphrodisiac... especially on you?
It wasn't my intention to craft your panties to look like the shammy from the car wash on Richmond Highway.
When was the last time your panties were that wet?...soaked?…super saturated?
The last time was probably when you did your laundry…but I am sure it isn't water that has made them as soaked and as wet as they are now!
It wasn't my intention-on to have on a shirt that was open slightly to show a peek of my chest…(and a little hair too)
I didn't know you enjoyed that…but then again I was just taking a sip of my Long Beach Iced Tea from across the room.
I assure you that it wasn't done maliciously...really it wasn't… to have to wonder what was in my mind when I caught that peek of you… and these several peeks thereafter
Tell me...
Did you ponder about my intellect…could I please you with my mind…could the dendrites in your brain exhale from a man that can…and definitely will…challenge your thoughts…and yearn for your tongue to contort and speak…
ears itching to listen to sweet sounds of knowledge…from an educated black man…(we are in abundance sistas?)
I wonder how many college courses did you grace with your opinions and sense…
What do your co-workers say about you and the way you smile even when someone gets on your damn nerves… as you say sweetly and lightly under your breath…I wish a muthafucka would!...or…I'm about to take of my stilettos and shoe whip a bitch!
I also wonder about you as you take another sip…
your body moving and swaying in a syncopated motion to the music
making me rise and want to explode inside of you…
Did you think about the way I held my glass as I sipped my Long Beach Iced Tea?...Did you mentally take a measurement of my hand…Did you try to look at the length and width of my fingers…would it fit tightly inside of your…"glove"…
Would it provide for you the satisfaction
Imagining the way I held the glass would be the way I would hold your ass when you would sit on my lap?
Did you consider whether or not my arms were comparable in dimension, to the length of me...would it be able to penetrate deep inside of you to the point that every movement up and down…in and out would… touch your sexual faucet ever so slowly and make your juices, your pleasure…your purity rain on my wand?
Damn I wish I could be the straw in your Mohito right now…(imma leave that alone…but you get my drift)
Sexiness in all aspects is what I can say about you...the curve of your shoulders…the glisten in your gloss (keep it poppin')…the curves of your breasts…the definition of your ankles…smoothness of your thighs…the streaks of color in your hair…the taste from your oven…your olive garden…your natural elixir…
It was un-intention-on to make your nipples harder than Vector Calculus…as I purposely took a long sip of my drink…and lick my lips...looking at you hoping if you knew that I could taste you in my drink…or so I wished to…
I yearned to take you into my shower and indulge in the flavor that dripped off of your body…I needed you to melt slightly…behold you flavor…I begging and urging you to cream…tasting your cum all over me…
It wasn't my intention to look at a goddess of your caliber at the same time I was sipping a Long Beach Iced Tea…but I did
You have to believe me...un-intention-on!

I Love You, But God Love's You More!

Friday, May 21, 2010

The Answers To All Questions!

Whether you believe it or not, every question has an answer…sometimes it is not what you may want to hear, or what you expect, but all questions have answers. Consider the latter to be a thought you should keep in mind when you ask why someone does something that seems unfathomable to you or that doesn’t not make any sense (to the sane at least). If you happen to think of the question or even ask that question then you understand what my life has been like…and I do mean all of it. I have this amazing blessing that some are not blessed with (it doesn’t make me more blessed than others) I just recognize my blessings and try to make sure I am thankful for them and use them in the best way possible. I know I have the blessing of favor, but what I am also able to see is that I have been blessed with the ability to endure!
Why am I the way I am? I have seen the ugly side of the human mind. I have seen and felt first hand how underhanded and sneaky people can be. From family members lying out of their lips saying how much they love you, to a church denying you monetary help because you have not helped them monetarily. I have seen it. I have felt it. I have seen a woman used by a man just for her money and then leave when the gig was up…no more money to gain. I have seen the hypocrisy of those church going Christians. I have endured the mistakes that others make when you trust them to do the right thing, the best thing, and just walk away denying their mistakes. I have seen it, felt it, breathed it, and lived it. Yet and still I continue to endure and move on.
One of the best things that comes out of this blessing is not just the favor that is granted by God to understand and know that all will be alright after you have endured, (see Job and see Joseph) but the ability to have patience and visualize that large picture in the presence of the people that just don’t believe you can move on in spite of their negativity (see Nehemiah and see Jesus). To understand me and all that I have seen and encountered means that you have to go through the process of enduring, patience, and visualization. The aforementioned leads me to the book of Galatians and the “fruits of the spirit” which are love (got that), joy (got that), peace (getting there), patience (too much), kindness (I don’t like to admit it but I am), goodness (I try to be), faithfulness (got that), gentleness (sometimes), and self-control (a whole lot of that). I truly believe that these are the facets of our gifts and our blessings. We are prepared in different ways to attain these and when we do, that is when we know the “meaning” of our lives.
This brings me back to where I started. Whether you believe it or not, every question has an answer…sometimes it is not what you may want to hear, or what you expect, but all questions have answers. So when you have asked and thought about that question you want an answer to, and think you don’t have an answer as to why people do such horrible things…you have an answer. I will help you…just say I DON’T KNOW, but I am sure in time…I will have an answer that you will want to know!

I Love You But, God Love’s You More!

Friday, May 14, 2010

I saw "reality" and I changed the channel!

I don’t mean to do it, but sometimes I am curious because I have heard a lot about it from friends and also Facebook status messages that stem from such stupidity as, For The Love Of Ray J.(he and those women are young, dumb, and full of…), to Tough Love (your relationship is that bad you want the world to know and some fool cursing at you and telling you how dumb you are…yeah you are dumb), to Basketball Wives (rich by marriage and circumstance bimbos that have nothing better to do than be rich by marriage and circumstance bimbos with a camera recording their oh so pitiful lives), to The Real Housewives of…you fill in the city (BAFOONERY!!), to The Apprentice (don’t these people know how to retire out of the spotlight and be happy), to Bad Girls Club (Let me see, these girls are so bad that they get to show the world on television how bad they are? Pitiful!), to Survivor (…of what?), to What Chilli Wants (her washed up career back…her ass should want that)…WHO THE HELL CARES! I watched one episode and I am sickened that these people have such affluent lives in the bank account, but such sorry ass lives when it comes to living.

For example, why in the world can’t Ray J. date a woman at a time (or 2 or 3) like us normal folks do? Must this idiot have 20 women living together in a house at the same time and making them endure ridiculous competitions to find out who he wants to be his lady? Do not say he must take these measures because of his celebrity status and wealth that he has to do this bullshit. On the real, (and not hating) if he was all that great and famous of an entertainer, he would not be doing a damn reality show.

Why are these “housewives” (you fill in the city) trippin’ off of petty shit? One “housewife” is bickering because some other “housewife” said something about her and it was not true. Another “housewife” is complaining because she wants to go to Italy but there are no more first class seats. Then another “housewife” who is not married is wearing an engagement ring given to her by a man that is already married (not separated…none of that)…and she wears it with no reservation! Stupid!

Then I watched out of curiosity the basketball wives show and I am about to vomit in my mouth. They shop, drink, and talk just about…wait for it…wait for it…wait for it…EVERYDAY! They have some real issues huh…typical more money more bullshit to me.

Chilli, do you really expect to find a man when you are just as uptight, stuck up, and lost as the people who drool over your show? Go back and sing a song, make an album, make a pizza. It is awful!

These reality shows are sick to me and make me so glad I am not rich and miserable. I am comfortable, blessed, drama free, and happy. These people are just the epitome of sad. It is comical…enough to put on a weekly show. The reality is their sad state of life! I hope you can watch it and laugh I just can’t look at this crap at all…put on some cartoons and live like a kid again!!

I Love You But, God Love's You More!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Gender Justice


The change in gender roles in relationships is more apparent now than I can recall. There was a time in which us men were the emotional unavailable, the wall that no one could penetrate, not willing to communicate, out for sex and sex only, not willing to express our feelings, and out for just doing the bare minimum for a woman and everything for our own benefit. Those days are still here but there has been a major shift away from men towards women from what I can see. The ladies are the Players and not ashamed of it and more men are in the role of the ones who want commitment and honesty. What the hell has happened? It sounds like gender justice to me. The one thing a man (or woman) does not want to reckon with is fairness. It seems that the unruly deeds that us men were used to inflicting upon women are coming back to bite us everywhere. If a man lies to a woman and does her dirty...we should expect the same to happen to us...that is fairness...gender justice. The fairness role is in various aspects of life but I feel it is a fear that everyone has, especially in relationships. A rule I would extend to anyone who wants to be or is currently in a relationship would be the following: If it is fair that the result of someone else's actions happens to you in return...then you had better believe that it is fair if your actions make it a result for someone else!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Picking the Scabs

What does my kiss mean to you?
Does it help to ease the pain you still go through?
What visions appear in your mind when you touch the scars?
Is it an infectious stain of infatuation that you masked in the dark?
I know I may mean nothing to you...maybe just a friend
Another potential cut, a laceration that hurts with no end
If your feelings grow, I'd wish to be the ointment used to sooth
So if you label this...then I offer these directions to you
Take time to let the images fade
Let time take the anger away
Everyone is not your lover, nor do they intend
And when love is done you have no obligation to begin again
What did love mean to you?
Was it a helpless, selfless thing that you sought to make brand new?
Reminders of mistakes and hasty decisions aren't very far
Refreshed memories arrive when I touch the scars.


I Love You But, God Love's You More!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Should I Be Offended?

A young lady that I met not too long ago called me and inquired of my relationship status, in which she already knew that I am single and not really looking. She proceeded to ask me questions concerning children, and of course I said that I am indifferent about it. If I got married (which I am not) I would then embark upon starting a family if my wife also agreed. So my friend then asks me if I would date a lady with children. I replied that it depended on the age of the child, how many children the woman has, the presence of the father, and some other factors that escape my mind at the moment. So she then tells me about her friend who is divorced and is looking to meet a nice guy (me nice? LOL) and that I came to mind. I then ask my friend, "Okay, so what's up with the prerequisite questions?" She then explains the following to me:

1. Her friend is divorced. (Yeah she told me that.)
2. Her friend is looking for a nice guy. (This is like the Springer show I am waiting for the rock to fall.)
3. Her friend is 33 years old. (LA LA LA..just singing in my head.)
4. HER FRIEND HAS 4 CHILDREN - BUT HER EX-HUSBAND...THE FATHER OF 3 OF THE CHILDREN...IS STILL ACTIVE IN THE LIVES OF THE CHILDREN. (That's a deal breaker for me.)
5. The children range in age from 4 to 12. (I really stopped paying attention.)
6. She is a very attractive woman. (My ears went into a small amount of deafness.)

My friend then continues to tell me how nice her girlfriend is and so on and so forth and that she thought I would be a nice guy for her friend to get to know. I said no. I was a little pissed off by that point and just got off the phone with her. I felt offended and in shock that someone would even have the impudence to think that a single man with no children who has never been married, would entertain a situation as I have explained above.
My question is would you be offended that a friend of yours would try to set you up or consider you a match with someone that is divorced with 4 children, and you have not experienced their lifestyle at all?



I Love You But, God Love's You More!

The Box Spring Boogie


I can admit that it has been a long time since I did the box spring boogie. It is not that I can't organize a time and date to do it with a lady that I desire, but sex really has not been a priority. Work and overcoming the residue of my mother's death is more pressing, but I can admit when the hormones are raging...and the urges are starting to creep and creep into my brain and then into the rest of my physical anatomy and then it has to be released, and I will tell you that the lady that is the recipient of the box spring boogie had better tape her health insurance card to her forehead because it is going to be extremely physical. She might have to be medically cleared before she can return to the box spring for more with me. I am not going to hurt her or anything like that, but I can say that the experience will be one of a pleasurable nature and well I hope the box spring will hold up!

I Love You, But God Love's You More!

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

The Pink Panther


I know that I’m looking at you in our retrospect
Strangely these days
Please pardon my flabbergasted facial attitude
Sometimes I know you want to call
Other times I wish I could call as well
But to be realistic
I can’t control the head-prints of others on your pillow
I can only control mine
I continue constantly reminiscing about when you would whisper in my ear
Inviting me to take part in your honey tasting opportunities
Then our mutual taste testing episodes would proceed
So sweet, gentle, and satisfying every time you entered my domicile
Unfortunately those days and nights are gone
Dreaming that they were still around
Playful pleasing and tasteful teasing
Quenching our desire was always fun

Now I hear from some of our mutual friends…
Hmm…
So you 2 met at the party the other night
Now you have found someone new
I’m not hating, but I never thought that in the
Company of your girls you would ever feel this way
I thought that you only play with toys that don’t break
Do you remember me?
You never had to worry about changing or charging the batteries
The pulsation was never controlled by a calibrated setting
Your wrist won’t ever suffer carpel tunnel syndrome
Never will I be jealous, I know you love what I have
I’m much wider, longer, and stronger
Your artificial male, your pink panther
Could never replace me!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!!

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Straight nasty!

So the weather has warmed up considerably the past several days, and the folks are coming outside to relax and of course they are less dressed. (I do enjoy some of the sights that the ladies are presenting, but I digress!) Relaxation in the sun is a wonderful thing in some respects and in others it is quite sickening. Take for instance as I am walking to see about my transcript yesterday on the wonderful George Washington University campus and as I am walking by the student union building I see many folks laying in the grass reading, chatting, and surfing the net. Some are flat on their back taking in the rays of the sun and enjoying the weather. They are rolling in the grass hair all laying up in the weeds and grass blades.

I am laughing to myself because it is sickening to me. Why in the ham sandwich would you subject yourself to such foolishness? Hello folks don't you think the ants, pin worms, bugs, hell insects period feel like it is a nice day outside as well? Come on people that is straight nasty and they wonder why they have insect bites, scabs, tarnished skin...ewww...it is filthy to me. Look people sit on benches and chairs…please.That is what they are there for! That is disgusting. Remember if it is a nice day and warm and comfortable outside to you…then it is to the bugs as well!!! SOMEONE NEEDS TO CLEAN YOU WITH HOLY WATER AND SOME LYSOL!

I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Just Call Her...SUGASNACKZ!!


Could you call my doctor because I think my blood sugar is high?

Please… To answer your question...Yeah it's going to be that way for awhile

Forever (maybe) I am sure of it

She is so damn sweet…not Frosted Flakes (of corn) sweet, not like the chocolaty, peanut buttery sweetness from a bag of Reese's Pieces

Nah...I mean the sweet like a sugar dumpling grandma made with left over dough

sweet like sucking the honey from those flowers that stink so damn much

I mean I am hooked I can't lie

Maybe even whipped…

Just call her Sugasnackz

I know I am not supposed to indulge in sweet things but I can't allow myself to be deprived of her

She is a butterscotch shake; tasty and filling...her calories to me are like an orgasm from a woman that hasn't had one…hmmm…since she first got some

{Sorry had to get a little ghetto…excuse me… urban}

But for real I can't allow myself to exist without trying to taste her...smell her…hear her…feel her

She is so warm like putting on a shirt freshly out of the dryer...it's warm and it soothes

Sugasnackz has a fresh style all of her own…her process of getting dressed makes me…excitedly endowed and ready...if you check what I'm saying

From the colors of the attire, the perfection of manicured fingers and toes, from the shine from her teeth...the girl is sweet

Victoria has no secrets to hide and the rumors are true

Bath and body works has nothing in the catalog so sweet and smells so delectable

That's Sugasnackz

Cool and chill

Subtle and smooth

Just call her Sugasnackz


I Love You, But God Loves You More!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

The Art of Sucking Up!


I do not give out very many compliments unless I really mean it. On the other hand, I do not receive very many compliments and if I do...yeah I question the motive behind it. I was told today that I was missed. You know I had to ask why because well, a person can miss a lot of things but if you don't ask what it is then you will not know. So I was told that my sense of humor and my warmth were missed. Doesn't that sound like a Hallmark card to you?

Well anyway I am very very hesitant of this response because I do not know where it is coming from and you know me, I ask. I was told that she thinks about me from time to time and then she asks why not? That doesn't answer the question. Well the whole point of it all is that I do question the kindness of others to actually see if it is kindness or an ulterior motive. In fact, in this particular situation I told her I was not interested and did not want to see her several months ago...so what's up with the sucking up? Time will soon tell but hell I refuse to let my guard down and especially not now!

I Love You, But God Love's You More!

Monday, April 5, 2010

Fukin' Wit Me!

Your momma got one mo' time
To call me out of my name
My whole reaction will change from respect
Into a murder suspect
If she keeps fukin' wit me
Keep on fukin' wit me
If they don't read the damn e-mail
I sent 3 times before
I ain't gonna send it no more
Take my shyt and walk out the door
They won't see me workin' here no more
If they keep fukin' wit me
Keep on fukin' wit me
Why is her drunk azz bumpin' into me
I know she got eyes to see
It won't take no time for my evil mind to think
Just let her make me spill my drink
If she keeps on fukin' wit me
Keep on fukin' wit me
I'm not gonna ask your brother any more times
I want back every last single dime
I done seen him wearin' a new gold chain
I might have to re-posses it as an even exchange
If he keeps on fukin' wit me
Keep fukin' wit me

Why y'all keep fukin' wit me?
Fukin' fukin' wit me?
What if I was fukin' wit you?
Just fukin' fukin' wit you?

I know yo' daddy tends to be really rude
And he's got one mo' time
Before I commit a crime
And whoop his behind
If he keeps on fukin' wit me
Keep fukin' wit me
Yo' sista truly has some nerve
Tellin' you every rumor 'bout me
That she claims she has heard
Don't make me tell what I know
She been spreadin' her bony azz legs from coast to coast
If she keeps on fukin' wit me
Keep fukin' wit me
My nasty neighbors ain't got no pride
They keep dumpin' their nasty trash outside
Let that trash be in front of my door
Imma throw these people from the fourth floor
If they keeps on fukin' wit me
Keep fukin' wit me


Why y'all keep fukin' wit me?
Fukin' fukin' wit me
She keeps fukin' wit me
Fukin' fukin' wit me
He keeps fukin' wit me
Fukin' fukin' wit me
You keep fukin' wit me
Fukin' fukin' wit me
They keep fukin' wit me
Fukin' fukin' wit me

The express line don't want to move
Imma tell dis lady need to take her azz back to school
I know she can count and not guess
Ain't got no where near 15 items or less
If she keeps fukin' wit me
Keep on fukin' wit me
If this child don't stop runnin' 'round the room
Imma send his azz to heaven real soon
Gonna knock the hell out of him
His momma need her tubes rearranged in to a jungle gym
If he keeps fukin' wit me
Keep on fukin' wit me
If he don't stop switchin' from lane to lane
Ain't nobody movin', and the light ain't change
He might not make it to his life's next page
Cuz imma unleash some serious road rage
If he keeps fukin' wit me
Keep on fukin' wit me

Why y'all keep fukin' wit me?
Fukin' fukin' wit me?
What if I was fukin' wit you?
Just fukin' fukin' wit you?

I Love You, But God Love's You More!

Friday, April 2, 2010

Your Do Do!

Your sunshades poppin' in sync with the Spring sun
Smelling sweeter than a Cuban breeze
You could walk past me any day...any time...
In my every dream or in all thoughts of my mind
You make my heart thump louder than a bass drum
Baby keep doing your do do
Keep doing your do do
I'll just keep wishin' that I'm the one you do it to
Diva is a word that I'm sure will offend you
Egolicious attitude with a sexy walk that is too smooth
Sexy thighs and hips makin' my mind take erotic guilt trips
Until I see you pass by me again
Baby keep doing your do do
Keep doing your do do
I'll just keep wishin' that I'm the one you do it to
Call it an infatuated crush if you must
But I can't wait 'til you come by my way again
Walk alone or walk with a crew of your friends
And I'll be standing there
So don't be gone for to long
Baby keep doing your do do
Keep doing your do do
I'll keep wishin' that I'm the one you do it to


I Love You, But God Love's You More!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

The Overlooked Easter Story

Circumstances from the past several months have caused me to have some insight on the Easter holiday and the importance of a part of the passage concerning Easter that is often overlooked.
I was prompted to write this by what a friend had said to me and also from what God said to me. Thus, I will express my interpretation. I will say that God really pays attention to detail and as a Chemist, I understand the impact that details have upon the smallest of things.
For the record I know I am not a person of the “cloth” and that I am not one who writes sermons as a pastor would do, I just submit my thoughts on this one verse, and trust that you too will find delight in it as I did.
Easter is this weekend and most of us know the story about the resurrection of Jesus Christ on that day. But did you ever think of the importance of the following verse:
John 20:1 (New International Version)
The Empty Tomb
Early on the first day of the week, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene went to the tomb and saw that the stone had been removed from the entrance.

I have to say that it may look like a simple verse of what was seen, but to me it is more than that. I have a tomb that I have enclosed things in my life that I need to set free. Some issues with my way of thinking that is different from most people, the difficulty I have trusting people, my reluctance to allow myself to get involved in romantic relationships, pain from lost friends and family, my health and the various occurrences I deal with regarding that, and yes how much I truly miss my mommy. But I look at this verse and Jesus was trapped in a tomb as well.

I suppose it is alright to be trapped in that tomb that some of us are trapped in. You can label the stone of that tomb JESUS because that is where he was. You can label tomb a ALCOHOLISM because some folks are dealing with that. Some people have had issues stemming from HORRIBLE CHILDHOOD, dealing and coping with those who have lost someone they love in a violent or even in a way that took their life in a shocking fashion. Label that tomb LOSS. I have a tomb that has stone labeled DIABETES. I have a tomb that has a stone label TRUST. Others have tombs that have stones labeled, FAILING MARRIAGE, NOT ENOUGH MONEY FOR BILLS, PARENTING PROBLEMS, HOMELESSNESS, GETTING THROUGH SCHOOL, RELATIONSHIPS, FINDING A JOB, CANCER, PREGNANCY, HUNGER, DRUGS… and the list can go on and on. But it says in the aforementioned verse that the stone had been removed. And when it was removed Jesus was set free and we know the rest of that story.

I know that I have some stones that have enclosed and shut in some issues in my life that I know I can't deal with by myself, Lord knows I have tried, but I know for a fact that the God that sits high and looks down low, the God the gives us tests that He knows we can pass and that has been good to us, has rolled stones away. I know that some of the stones I have may have put a strain on me and my actions…how I speak and how I live. Some are really hard to overcome, but the fact of the matter is that God is still rolling stones away to allow you and I to let it go and be free.

I can envision and hear the sounds of stones being rolled away from our own personal tombs with various labels allowing freedom and joy to overwhelm us. I know I have asked God to roll my stones away, and they have been slowly moving away to allow myself to regain the appetite that I have for life that grows each day.

Tears of joy and jubilation…and that dance that accompanies it (like they are David) will come when my friends and others that I know that are going through it finally get those large boulders away from their personal tombs. Take it from me that life can only get sweeter and sweeter when those labeled and unlabeled stones that plague your life are gone.

I would never want to have a life in which God did not roll that stone away that was labeled JESUS. God did it for His son; imagine what He will do for us! I thank God in advance for rolling my stones away!

I Love You, But God Love's You More!