1. Her friend is divorced. (Yeah she told me that.)
2. Her friend is looking for a nice guy. (This is like the Springer show I am waiting for the rock to fall.)
3. Her friend is 33 years old. (LA LA LA..just singing in my head.)
4. HER FRIEND HAS 4 CHILDREN - BUT HER EX-HUSBAND...THE FATHER OF 3 OF THE CHILDREN...IS STILL ACTIVE IN THE LIVES OF THE CHILDREN. (That's a deal breaker for me.)
5. The children range in age from 4 to 12. (I really stopped paying attention.)
6. She is a very attractive woman. (My ears went into a small amount of deafness.)
My friend then continues to tell me how nice her girlfriend is and so on and so forth and that she thought I would be a nice guy for her friend to get to know. I said no. I was a little pissed off by that point and just got off the phone with her. I felt offended and in shock that someone would even have the impudence to think that a single man with no children who has never been married, would entertain a situation as I have explained above.
My question is would you be offended that a friend of yours would try to set you up or consider you a match with someone that is divorced with 4 children, and you have not experienced their lifestyle at all?
I Love You But, God Love's You More!
How is it a dealbreaker that the father is a presence in their lives? If anything, that's a plus - that means the woman is mature enough to remain on good terms with the father of her children, and that their father isn't some no-good slacker who bailed on his kids.
ReplyDeleteIf you don't want to deal with divorce or kids (I know I wouldn't be able to deal with four children), that's your prerogative, but writing her off for being able to co-parent her kids strikes me as weird.
Sbould you be offended? No. I think, if anything, you should be flattered that the caller thought you might be open-minded enough to consider a date with her friend.
No, I wouldnt be offended but maybe my opinion is alittle bias. I am a divorced mother of 4 ages 14,13,12 and 8. I feel that men sometimes get the impression that when a woman has children that she is either looking for a father for her kids or has baby daddy drama. But that is not always the case and in my case I have none of that going on. I myself dont think i would ever get remarried so basically me meeting someone would just be for companionship and company. To be honest i never had a problem meeting men and then when they find out I have four children still do stick around so i feel that a man shouldnt be offended when a friend tries to set him up with a woman with children he shouldn't automatically cast judgement. He should take the time to get to know that individual.
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